Sometimes

Sometimes I wonder why I can never seem to write exactly how I feel. Even when I can feel it so perfectly in my mind and heart, it can never be written. Why? All I would like to do right now is to throw it out there, somewhere - whether it be on paper, a computer, out into the air in between a conversation or into someone's arms. I would love nothing more than to just express exactly to the point how I feel and why and just let it go. Sometimes I would just like to sit with someone and talk about things that aren't really important, or just laugh for minutes on end. Those are some of the best times, wouldn't you agree? Sometimes I wish I had more than my thoughts, a pen and paper to record all that I feel - sometimes I want something real, not something written. Something written seems to be something at first, and then it turns into...nothing. Nothing ever read, understood or felt. Yet...I find myself doing it time and time again...even now!
And after all these sometimes and somethings, I realize how ungrateful these thoughts are...these wants are. I find myself realizing that although I may not have everything I want, and may never get to have some of them, I do have prayer. Prayer is a gift - and what a wonderful gift it is! Knowing that you never need to worry about bothering someone, or having them not pay attention, or having them pretend like they care...no, those aren't even an option. Prayer is perfect communication. Prayer is perfect listening. Prayer is perfect caring. Prayer is perfect. Prayer is Heavenly Father. Prayer is something we need. Prayer is something we should value and treasure. Prayer is a divine gift from the Divine. He is always there, waiting and wishing we would talk to Him.
Sometimes I wish I would remember this more often...